From August 2023 through July 2024, I decided to move to France to learn more about French culture and explore what France has to offer! In this blog, I’m going to share what it was like for me to spend a year living in the suburbs of Paris as an American au pair. If you’re wondering if this is the experience for you, I hope this blog helps you decide if this is the right path.
I’m going to include pictures along the way from my experiences during this past year, because there are so many events opportunities, and things to do outside of being an au pair!
P.S. – read all the way to the end for the most heart felt message my host sister left me at the end of my stay!
Be sure to leave a comment below if you have any questions, or want to share your own experience as an au pair for others to read!
At a Glance:
Bonus: Check out my interview with Katie from Welcome to Versailles on my experience as an au pair in Paris!
Why I Chose to Become an Au Pair
My Post-University Decision
After graduating from Arizona State University with my Bachelor’s Degree in May of 2023, I decided to take a gap year with my career and spend one year abroad living in France. In the spring of 2022, during my junior year of college, I studied abroad in Lyon, France, and afterwards, I knew in my heart that I needed to live in France again. I couldn’t explain it, it was just a strong feeling I had inside of me and I knew I needed to move back.
Moving to France as an American can be difficult due to the visa requirements to stay long term. I originally wanted to find a job in France right out of college, but the job search seemed never-ending. Additionally, the company would need to sponsor my visa, when they could easily hire someone who is French with no stress.
My Goals for Becoming an Au Pair
I decided to become an au pair for a few reasons. The main reason was to take a gap year after university to explore a new opportunity while I had nothing tying me down to any city, and to explore more of the world while really being immersed in the French culture as I live with a French family.
The second reason I decided to become an au pair was that I had to goal of passing the DALF B2 exam in French by the end of my year. This exam and certificate lasts your entire life and is recognized by universities and corporations, allowing you to attend a French university or find an internship or job. Thus, if I decided to stay in France after being an au pair, it would be easier for me to find a job or be accepted into a university!
I’m really glad I had these goals for myself, as it allowed me to stay focused during this year, and reminded me why I chose to be here when times were confusing or hard. I definitely recommend making goals for yourself so you can still feel growth during your time abroad!
My Experience
Adjusting to Living in France as an Au Pair
I arrived in Paris, France on August 30th, 2023 and my host dad picked me up from the airport. We then drove 45 minutes to their suburb of Clamart, just south of Paris. They live in a beautiful town that was quiet but always filled with people walking through the streets, especially in the centre-ville.
I was welcomed into their home with a warm lunch of rotisserie chicken, melon, and of course baguettes and cheese. I instantly felt the warmth from my family, and they took the time to show me around town and explain the public transportation system for reaching the center of Paris. This made the transition much easier, as I wasn’t sure what to expect with this new path!
I took care of their two kids, my host brother who was 10 years old, and my host sister who was 12 years old. I was their first au pair, so it took some getting used to this unique situation for all of us. The kids weren’t necessarily used to having someone always around, and were sometimes unsure of my role (the son thought I had responsibilities of a maid), so there was confusion and tension at times.
As the months progressed, we became comfortable with each other, however with the 10 year old, we had a lot of differences which made it difficult to get along with him. I’m not going to lie, he made this year really difficult for me, and I often questioned why am I doing this, and if it’s even worth it if I finish out my contract. But nevertheless, I decided to finish out the year.
By the end of my year, my host sister and I grew so close and I really felt like she was my little sister! We bonded over so many things, and it made me feel very loved when she would light up when I walked in the room, even on my day off. She made my experience absolutely worth it.
For more details on how I adjusted to my new life during the first few months as an au pair, read this blog!
My Role as an Au Pair
My role as their au pair was to introduce them to my American culture, teach them English, help them with homework, and pick up the youngest from school.
Since I was their first au pair, the kids did not have a lot of exposure to English, so we mostly communicated in French. They also did not have any interest speaking English! So when I tried to talk to them in English they would get upset or just look at me funny until I said it in French. For me, this worked out fine because I was really able to improve my French!
Around December, my host sister had an epiphany and realized she could go to school in England if she improves her English, so she started to become more interested in learning, and throughout the spring, we mostly spoke in English together.
It was so rewarding seeing my host sister improve! By the end of the year, we read the first Diary of a Wimpy Kid book together and she absolutely loved it. She really enjoyed learning slang words like “jerk” and loved the “Cheese Touch”. It brought me so much joy seeing her enjoy a book I loved so much when I was around her age. Though it was difficult because it was the first book she read in English, she decided to start another book in English at the same time, as the series she was reading had only translated the first book into French from English, so her only option to continue the series was to read it in English. I was so proud!
However with my host brother, he detested English, and refused to try to learn. This was one of the issues we had, among many. It became very difficult to do my job when he wouldn’t be willing to accept suggestions or help as a native English speaker. The parents had spoke with him many times, but the situation didn’t seem to improve.
Perks of Being an Au Pair
Aside from my responsibility as an au pair, I was able to travel a lot throughout the year! I was able to visit Belgium, Poland, Nice, London, and Portugal. Being able to visit so many other places and meeting new people have really made this experience so much more memorable for me. I am so glad I decided to take advantage of my time off to explore!
Would I Recommend Becoming an Au Pair?
Despite the year being very challenging, I really feel like I grew so much throughout all of the obstacles. Without the challenges my ten year old gave me, my French wouldn’t have improved as much as it did because now I am able to respond in stressful situations and I’m able to articulate clearly what I want to say. This helped me a lot during my interviews when I was searching for an alternance for my masters program!
I decided not to take the DELF B2 exam because I was in a time crunch for applying to masters schools, however, I received level C1 from the TCF Tout-Public exam which is also recognized universities and corporations, but only lasts 2 years. I was completely surprised by my results and never thought I’d reach level C1!
I am also so thankful for my host family. I feel like I lucked out because they were very kind and enjoyed sharing their culture with me by showing me classic French dishes throughout the year, and celebrating holidays together.
However, not all host families are like mine. Some just hire an au pair in hopes to have a full time nanny, or they don’t make the time to welcome them and share their culture. I’ve had many au pair friends who have experienced this, but I am here to say that good host families exist!
A lot of the time, I’ve seen that the first host family people receive isn’t the best because they don’t know what to look for in their future host families, but when they switch to a second family, it ends up being a great match. I am happy, though, that I didn’t need to find a new family!
If you’re looking for a completely immersive experience in French culture (or any culture for that matter), and enjoy being around kids, becoming an au pair would be a great option for you.
You can choose almost any contract length, from 3 months to a year, and some people even extend to two years. For me, one year was a good amount of time. It allowed me to settle into the city and adjust to the new lifestyle. By the six month mark, I had only recently overcome my home sickness, so I’m glad I stayed longer to really enjoy living here!
If you have any questions about becoming an au pair in France, feel free to leave me a comment!
Xx,
Carmela
Under The Sun 
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